First of all, I want to thank all of you for hanging in with me through this past week. It’s been a difficult one. I also want to let you know that chances are what I’m posting here may not be the end of the scene, and likely won’t be. But it did feel like a pause point and I’d worked so hard on this and you all have waited so patiently that I thought I would go ahead and post it. Please, as always, feel free to comment. I do read all of your comments and enjoy seeing feedback from you on the site. This scene has been kicking my ass hard and between a seemingly endless succession of distractions (including the worst allergy attack I’ve ever experienced in my life) and the inherent difficulties in the scene, I finally got it pretty much down, I think. I’ll fess up straightaway to some known issues:
The pacing needs work. I know it does. The main culprit here, I think, is that I have some clumsily-written transitions and places where conversation drags and places where narrative exposition is too brief. That’s the sort of thing that gets fixed in editing, so I’m not all too concerned about it now. One of the most common bits of advice I’ve read for beginning novel writers is to resist the urge to revise and edit the draft while writing it, to just “get it down”.
The length. I am concerned that this scene runs so long (over 1,800 words, believe it or not). I would like to break it up, but structurally I’m not sure how to do it. All of the events take place in the same place and time and among the same set of characters. How can I make this into two scenes? It would be like trying to book a flight from JFK to La Guardia. So, ‘yes’ I know it’s long, and ‘no’ I have no idea what to do about it. If any of you have any ideas, I’m all ears. Just post them in the comments section below the scene on the scene page.
At any rate, and without further ado, here’s the link to Chapter 2 – Scene Three. Enjoy!